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January 17, 2019

A New Year's resolution is a tradition, most common in the Western Hemisphere but also found in the Eastern Hemisphere, in which a person resolves to change an undesired trait or behavior, to accomplish a personal goal or otherwise improve their life. 

New Year's resolutions tend to get a bad rap for being, well, fruitless. But making resolutions with a partner can help you stick to your promises and can also strengthen your relationship. This list of resolutions-for-two will help you ring the New Year in right, and keep your relationship rockin' all year long. 

1. Forgive and Forget 
This year, strive to forgive your spouse as soon as they apologize or ask for forgiveness. It’s easy to hold a grudge or to bring up past grievances, but letting these things go and forgiving your spouse can lead to a happier self and a happier marriage! 

2. Spend More Time Together 
So many people are so busy, too busy. Life gets in the way and the important things in life tend to fall to the wayside. In 2019, resolute to spend more time with your spouse! Whether it be more date nights or more time at home together, I’m sure your spouse will appreciate having more of you in their life! 

3. Put Your Spouse First 
In a day and age when there are so many things that scream for our attention, it’s important that our spouses feels like they are important in our lives. This year, determine to put your spouse above all the noise trying to attract your attention. Determine to put them first. 

4. Seek God Together 
It’s sometimes easy to judge our spouse for the things they do, but learning to seek God together can help your relationship become stronger and help us learn to focus more on the things we need to fix in our own lives. Resolute to seek God together and watch your relationship grow stronger together and in God! 

5. Cultivate Common Interests 
It’s easy to do things that interest you personally, but why not learn some new hobbies with your spouse? This year, find some common interests that both you and your spouse would enjoy, and do them often! What better way to have fun with your spouse and learn more about them? 

6. Work Toward Conflict Resolution 
No marriage is perfect, but a peaceful marriage is one to strive for! Let the year you work toward healthy conflict resolution. Learn better strategies for your marriage and learn how to discuss things peacefully with your spouse. Strive toward healthy communication! 

7.  Keep the Passion Alive 
Maybe your marriage has gotten a little boring, you do the same things every day and nothing seems fun or out of the ordinary. Let 2019 be the year you change all that! Determine to keep the passion alive and help things get steamy instead of boring. You will both be thankful you did! 

8. Flirt more 
Who doesn’t like to flirt a little with their spouse? It’s fun and brings back the spice you might remember from your dating years! This year, resolute to flirt more with your spouse. There are so many fun ways to flirt, and your spouse just might be surprised and happy that you started it! 

9. Say, “I love you” every day 
A lot times it’s easy to assume that our spouse  knows we love them. But there are so many different ways to say and show that you love them. This year, don’t let a day go by without saying it. Resolute to say, “I love you” in a special way every day. 

10. Communicate Appreciation 
So many people feel under appreciated because their spouse doesn’t take the time to communicate appreciation for them and what they do. Don’t let another year go by without telling your spouse how much you appreciate them. Resolute to communicate appreciation as much as possible! 

11. Fight fair 
Most married couples fight, and even if a couple doesn’t fight out loud, partners often have silent fights that can still be traumatizing to both. The key is not to avoid fighting entirely, but to fight fairly. Take the new year as a moment to set boundaries and rules about how you will approach disagreements. Remember that you both deserve to have your feelings respected and heard, but since you are in a marriage, you also need to respect your spouse’s communications, needs and sensitivities. Fighting is inevitable, but neither of you needs to endure long-term trauma or risk tearing the integrity of your marriage by being sloppy about it. 

12. Give appreciation 
It’s completely natural to fall into habits in a marriage and forget to verbally appreciate your spouse. All of us do this from time to time, especially when busyness overtakes us. We start to just assume that our partner “should” take out the trash or “should” cook dinner, instead of remembering to appreciate the fact that he did. Using words of appreciation seems like such a simple thing to do, but it slips away in many marriages. Make a resolution together to appreciate the little things you do for each other. It might feel a little bit silly or forced at first, but do your best to stick with it and genuinely speak words of encouragement, thanks and love to your partner. 

13. Touch each other every time you watch Television 
One thing Crystal Rice, owner of Insieme Consulting, finds that couples in trouble have stopped being affectionate in non-sexual ways. So vow to do better! “By simply sitting next to your partner on the couch, you increase the probability of affection, a commodity often seen far too little in long-term relationships,” she says. 

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